Relationship depression can be defined as negative feelings of unhappiness, worthlessness or hopelessness etc. that arise between couples engaged romantically (married or otherwise) due to the pattern or structure of the relationship like comfort zone and depression. Relationship depression is a common phenomenon observed in younger as well as older couples, regardless of the duration of the relationship.
Relationship Depression Causes
The list of relationship depression causes is neither exclusive nor exhaustive! A few vivid as well as subtle causes are discussed below.
Pretense
Relationships nowadays begin on the pretext of pretense in order to gain approval and acceptance a partner. However, keeping up appearances is a stressful task. In the long run, couples suffer from depression due to their inability to behave as their actual selves. This is when a natural mood booster might be a good idea or communication. When they either partner lets go of the pretense, the significant other may not be ready to accept the personality of the partner and in this process of acceptance or rejection, depression may creep in.
Unresolved Issues
It is healthy for people in a relationship to have arguments, fights or rough patches. They may eventually end the disagreement, but many a time the issues underpinning arguments in the past remain unresolved. Fear of unresolved issues repeating themselves in the future is another factor contributing to relationship depression.
Doubts About the Relationship
Doubts about the very foundation of a relationship between two people may manifest into depression. Doubts accrue usually when a relationship is taken to the next level with giving it much thought and decisions are made on caprice. This may result in anxiety and stress due to an uncertain future.
Trust Issues
Trust is the foothold of all successful relationships. If partners in a relationship are suspicious by nature or have difficulty trusting one another, depression sets in. Partners may have trust issues arising from a past where either partners were unfaithful to the relationship but decide to take the high road and continue with the relationship for greater good. Such scenarios instil constant fear and feelings of dejection in both the partners- either due to feelings of guilt for having gone astray or inability to completely trust the other partner.
A Dominating Partner
It is common to find one partner more over powering or controlling in a relationship. In such cases, the submissive partner may sense feelings of being ‘let-down’ or loss of control over their own life and may end up being treated as a ‘door-mat’. The dominated partner may end up completing daily chores such as cooking, cleaning etc., with no feeling of achievement and eventually suffer from depression.
Change in Lifestyle
Partners in a relationship, married or unmarried, may start living differently to accommodate the tastes and behavior of their significant other. Compromises may be made in minute as well as big decisions to come to an agreement, thus leading to discontentment and depression.
Few other relationship depression causes include age gap between partners, different backgrounds or culture, lack of communication etc.
Relationship Depression Symptoms
Relationship depression symptoms normally go unnoticed and are usually brushed aside. Inability to communicate with the partner on an emotional level, reduced amount of time spent together, constant arguments and misunderstandings, disregard or inattentiveness towards partners’ desires, feelings of contempt and hate for each other, frequent power struggles in decisions about money, family or friends, condemning partners’ actions etc. are just a few relationship depression symptoms.